Water Cooler Talk from Two Guys Who Look Alarmingly Similar
All-Stars: Week 3
As card carrying members of the male gender, we're always keenly interested in matters pertaining to the female anatomy. Breasts, for example. We know the basics... they're nice to look at... they can be used to feed babies... and in a pinch they could be used as very enjoyable pillows.
We had no idea, however, that they were vital components in the process of fishing.
Tonight's leg of the race began with instructions to head to San Pedro de Atacama where the teams would find a clue at a church. From there, they were told to fly to Puerto Montt, and head to a fishery where they could use their breasts for the purpose of fishing. Really.
Danielle demonstrates the fine art of Boob Fishing, which in many ways is similar to Spear Fishing.
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Yes, while many of the teams were floundering (pun intended) at this challenge, Eric encouraged Danielle to "use her boobs" to assist in the process of transporting fish from one giant tank to another giant tank.
There have been very, very few times in our lives when we can recall wishing that we were fish, but this would indeed be one of those rare occasions.
Several teams were deathly afraid of the fish. Mirna was absolutely terrified of the fish, but she had to do this particular challenge because the tank contained almost four inches of water, which would have been plenty enough to drown Charla.
Mary announces that she is ascared of riding in the back seat of a car.
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Speaking of being afraid of things, we couldn't help but come to the conclusion that Mary and David are afraid of everything that does not happen to be native to Kentucky, like fried chicken.
As the onset of every single challenge in which we have ever seen them participate, Mary and David always begin by announcing that they're "ascared to death of it."
Tonight, they were ascared of fish. They were ascared of oceans, and water in general. Taxis. Cliffs. Rafts. Phil. Boobs. You name it, they have been ascared of it.
Uchenna is attacked by the Flounder of Doom.
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Once teams finally finished their boob fishing exercise, they were given a clue which told them to travel to La Maquina, where they could choose one of two tasks.
One task offered teams the option of scaling a rock wall where each person would retrieve half of their next clue. None of the teams went for this option, presumably because they couldn't figure out a way that their breasts could help them achieve that task.
The last vision Teri ever saw.
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Instead, every team opted for a whitewater rafting experience. During this task, the teams could obviously use their breasts as flotation devices.
While rafting through the rapids, Teri was wooshed out of the raft into the water, where she was instantly devoured by a school of hormonally-crazed flounder.
Once the rafting trip was over, those who survived were given instructions to head to Playa Petrohue, the next Pit Stop.
Mini Me is on hand to greet teams at the Pit Stop.
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In making the trip, Team Guido managed to mangle their car by backing over a forest, and the Hot Babe Team managed to skip a clue along the way, forcing them to retrace their steps.
Rob and Amber zipped to the Pit Stop, and were greeted by Phil and Mini Me. Our favorite duo learned that they once again had placed first, this time winning their own subcontinent and three French hens.
Even though they were ascared to death of finishing last and thereby being eliminated, Mary and David did indeed land on the mat last and were sent packing.
The Hot Babe Team is told that they don't have a clue. We suspect this isn't the first time they have been told this.
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We watched every episode of the season when David and Mary first competed a year or so ago.
You know, even though some people find them a bit annoying and obnoxious, after thinking about it for a while, we have to say in all honesty that we also find them to be really whiny.
Anyway, we bid them the best of luck, and hope that they're not too ascared of the plane trip back home.
We shall wrap up this commentary with the following picture, which we find to be very, very funny, but we can't quite put a finger on why:
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